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31
Dec
2009

A Big Damn Shame – The Fall and the Fury of “Firefly”

by Jennifer Harrison

In September of 2002, a new show from the mind of Joss Whedon premiered on FOX. This show was Firefly, and it was canceled after eleven episodes aired. Usually, cancelled shows go the route of hundreds of others, and fall into oblivion. Not so with Firefly.

In 2004 an Irish friend introduced me to Firefly via DVD. He was furious that I, a North American, had never heard of this show and therefore had participated in its demise. He ranted about the wonders of this Sci-fi / Western, and the brilliance of Joss Whedon (who already had Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel under his belt). I assumed he was going a tad overboard…until he put in the first disc.

Firefly takes place in the year 2517, and the population of Earth has long exceeded this planet. Now, humans have made all of space their home, with people piloting spaceships as we would cars. Inevitably, a war was fought to prevent the newfound Alliance from incorporating all of the planets under its control. Those that resisted the Alliance were called Independents, or Browncoats. Malcolm Reynolds was one such Browncoat fighting on the losing side of this war.

Now, Captain Mal Reynolds avoids Alliance control by living life with his crew aboard Serenity, a Firefly Class cargo ship. The show revolves around the crew of this ship, as they visit new worlds, make shady deals, and try to maintain their freedom.

I was blown away. Besides Star Wars, I would not consider myself a fan of Sci-Fi. I have never watched Battlestar Gallactica, or Stargate SG-1. However, Firefly was different – it was so REAL. It literally felt as though humans were merely conquering new territories, and the references to the Old West and Westerns abound.

The show is void of aliens. No aliens! It was simply one of the most realistic depictions of the future that I had ever seen. Everyone on the show was able to speak both English and Chinese, since these were the two Superpowers remaining on Earth-that-Was. The new frontier planets have elements of Asian culture, and people wear gun holsters ala the Wild West. I was enthralled.

Aside from this, the show had a terrific ensemble cast, including Adam Baldwin, Jewel Staite and Alan Tudyk. Greg Edmonson provided beautiful music that added to the excellence of the show. The writing was superior, and received rave reviews. Also, the effects were so great that the show won an Emmy for ‘Outstanding Visual Effects for a Series’ in 2003.

So, WHY WAS THIS SHOW CANCELLED?

It turns out that I was far from the first to ask this question. Immediately, this show developed a strong legion of fans, calling themselves Browncoats, determined to convince FOX that this show was worth saving. They became a huge presence on the Internet, created a postcard campaign, placed an ad in Variety magazine and helped push the DVD sales for the show into the stratosphere.

Most, like my Irish friend, took it upon themselves to introduce people to the show, as FOX did not give it much of a chance from the start, even forcing Joss to air the show out of order, something that is remedied upon buying the DVD set. Soon, studios began wondering about this cancelled show that lived on through DVDs.

This is when I joined the bandwagon, buying my own DVD set and lamenting about the loss of Captain Tightpants on the Internet. Browncoats began having ’shindigs’ and get-togethers, and the cast was mobbed at Comic-Con. The furor would not die down, and Joss Whedon pledged to find a way for our Big Damn Heroes to live on.

Then, on September 30th, 2005 our Big Damn Heroes found their way into cinemas for Serenity, our Big Damn Movie. This cancelled show had done the impossible and resurrected itself, a victory for the Browncoats. Rare is it that a cancelled show finds itself a major motion picture.

Today, our world lives on through Dark Horse comics, the Serenity role-playing game, a Serenity novelization, and various wonderful spots on the Internet. Visual companion guides exist for the show and the movie, and two books, Finding Serenity and Serenity Found attempt to explain the Firefly phenomenon.

Currently, a World of Warcraft- style online game is in development, and fans can once again interact with their beloved characters. Finally, I have a reason to get involved in the world of online gaming! Perhaps this method will introduce a new batch of Browncoats to the world of Earth-That-Was, the domination of the Alliance, and the way of life out in the black.

After all, as we learned in Serenity, you can’t stop the signal. And you can’t keep a great show down.

Tags: browncoats, cancelled, firefly, Jennifer, jennifer harrison, Joss Whedon, sci fi
Posted in Essays

31
Dec
2009

Top Ten Albums of the 00’s

1 Comment

by Ben Dalton

As this decade comes to a close, I’d like to be able to say that this also wraps up ten years of intense musical listening, but this would be wishful thinking at best. Truth be told, as the decade opened my musical taste little resembled what it is today, and for good reason: I was 15 years old, devoid of an older sibling to assist in my search for good music. I was at the peak of my pop-punk obsession, with blink-182 and Sum 41 dominating my discman playcounts. Kid A was a mere curiosity to me at the time, and I never actually heard the whole thing through until at least four years later. My first serious music purchase of the decade came in 2002 when following the viewing of I Am Trying to Break Your Heart, I decided I wanted to own Yankee Hotel Foxtrot. While my initial impression of the album was mixed, almost as if I was embarrassed to own what to me at the time was such a ‘grown-up’ album, there was a certain richness and complexity to the music that even my grade eleven self was drawn to, albeit hesitantly. What followed was a two-year screamo phase, when Thursday and The Used were the hot bands in my world. Yet existing alongside this blistering noise was a casual appreciation for Sigur Ros, shared amongst many of my friends that was simply taken for granted. Their music was so strange, so otherworldly yet so accessible. Other hot acts of the day fared less well in my books; I remember specifically disliking the Strokes, The White Stripes and Interpol upon first exposure. It wasn’t until 2004 and the Arcade Fire’s Funeral and the Postal Service’s Give Up that my taste in music began to move away from the maximalist distortion of screamo and began opening up to the many interesting things that contemporary music had to offer. 5 years later, there’s been so much amazing music made and so much more to discover. The sheer amount of music being produced is overwhelming but each year never fails to deliver a handful of stellar releases that I believe will stand the test of time. Ten years from now, it will be interesting to see which music from this decade ages well and what will end up sounding dated. But from my vantage point at the end of 2009, it was a hell of a ten years.

Honorable Mentions; Madvillainy- Madvillain (2004) , For Emma, Forever Ago- Bon Iver (2007), Kala- M.I.A. (2007), Return to Cookie Mountain- T.V. On the Radio (2006), The Milk-Eyed Mender- Joanna Newsom (2004), Untrue- Burial (2007), Sound of Silver- LCD Soundsytem (2007), Silent Shout- The Knife (2006), Original Pirate Material- The Streets (2002), Veckatimest- Grizzly Bear (2009)

10- Since I Left You- The Avalanches (2000)

The best party album of the decade is so much freakin’ fun that the fact that it’s built solely of samples from other records comes as a mere impressive afterthought. Which is not to say that Since I Left You is a mash-up record. Its samples are obscure; the end is more than the sum of its parts. I’m still waiting for the follow-up.

9- The Moon & Antarctica- Modest Mouse (2000)

Modest Mouse’s best album proves Isaac Brock to be one of the most captivating lyricists of our time; the record is filled with standout tracks brought together by an undercurrent of isolation and existential musings. Classic stuff.

8- Stankonia- Outkast (2000)

When was this not the best hip-hop album of the decade, if you can even call this freakfest anything resembling mainstream hip-hop to begin with? So musically and lyrically inventive they put basically all others to shame, the record still sounds so fresh today it’s hard to believe it’s almost ten years old.

7- Merriweather Post-Pavillion- Animal Collective (2009)

I knew from first listen back on January 1^st that this was something special. A year of listening has not changed my opinion. Psychedelic, warm, beautiful, strange; many adjectives can be thrown at this beast, but the response it elicits is essentially a personal one, and for me this is music for the soul. Accessible yet sounding like nothing else, these three boys create a lush universe that leaves me wanting more every time.

6- Ys- Joanna Newsom (2006)

I pity those people who say they can’t get past the vocal qualities of Joanna Newsom. Because however shrill and elf-like they may sound on first listen, they bring with them the best lyricist currently making music. Newsom’s music rewards repeated listens like little else out there; her songs can take a while to truly unravel. But man oh man, when they do what a beautiful sight (or sound). Who knew harp and vocals could be so endlessly rewarding?

5- Endless Summer- Fennesz

Fennesz albums don’t work the same way as most other music I’ve heard. They seem to grow less familiar over time, almost as if one’s idea or memory of the music is interchangeable with the music itself. And what music! Open, abstract, melodic yet not catchy enough to wear itself out, like listening to someone’s nostalgia made sonic from years past; Essential.

4- Yankee Hotel Foxtrot- Wilco

Wilco’s best and most fractured album perfectly marriages harmony and discord as if in a murky reflection of Jeff Tweedy’s damaged psyche. So many great songs, so much static and noise. Too bad they’ll never top it. (R.I.P. Jay Bennett)

3- Illinois- Sufjan Stevens

Where to begin with this puppy? This album blew my mind when I first heard it, and proceeded to get better from there. So many ideas, emotions and melodies it can fill five lesser records, so large in its scope yet also so intimate all at once, I’m not sure Stevens will ever top himself with this amazing album, which continues to give so much on every listen, almost five years later.

2- Kid A- Radiohead

As mentioned before, I was a relative late-comer to this un-crackeable masterpiece, but am now convinced its Radiohead’s finest hour, a tall statement indeed. As inexplicable as it must have seemed upon first release, Kid A is one of those rare albums that seems to exist in a universe of its own. It’s a lonely universe to be sure, filled with strange rock formations and undiscovered oceans, but its strangeness and un-knowability make it all the more re-listenable.

1- Person Pitch- Panda Bear

How the hell do you release the best album of the decade AND give it the decade’s best album cover all at once? I guess if you’re Noah Lennox. One third (the best third) of Animal Collective delivered in 2007 a record that eclipsed his group’s entire output while not sounding like anything they’d done before or since. Comparisons to the Beach Boys were apt, but Person Pitch is the rarest of albums: so packed with hooks, sometimes multiple great ones in one epic song you’d swear it was a greatest hits collection. But it’s the cohesiveness of the whole thing that gets me coming back again and again, as if the whole thing were one never-ending song; Person Pitch is a strange place, but a place worth visiting endlessly. And that’s a very rare thing indeed.

Tags: 2000s a decade in review, ben dalton, top ten music of the decade
Posted in 2000's: A Decade in Review, Lists, Reviews

27
Dec
2009

Up in the Air

1 Comment

a contemplative review by Jason Wilson

Up in the Air (2009)
Directed by Jason Reitman
Screenplay by Jason Reitman & Sheldon Turner
Based on the novel by Walter Kirn
Starring George Clooney, Vera Farmiga, Anna Kendrick, Jason Bateman, Danny McBride, Melanie Lynskey, JK Simmons, Zach Galifianakis, and Sam Elliott

Movies aren’t only about escaping, this much should be obvious. Sometimes a movie comes along where its subject matter fits the time period when it is released. Up in the Air is one of these movies. And while it has some laughs, it is not an uplifting film but there is a sense of hope underlying it.

Ryan Bingham (Clooney) fires people for a living. He is hired by companies to let their employees whom are no longer needed go. Considering the climate of careers and the global economy during the past year, the firing scenes alone should resonate with most viewers. Times aren’t easy and who knows if the job supporting your family will be there a week from now, a month from now or a year from now.

Bingham spends next to no time at rest in what most people call a “home”. He travels constantly as he is sent from city to city to fire people he has never met and will never see again. He doesn’t believe in the fairy tale existence of falling in love and living happily ever after. He moonlights as a motivational speaker reminiscent of Kerouac as he preaches from his corporate pulpit that our material possessions weigh us down to the point of paralysis.

Unlike Kerouac, Bingham believes the relationships in our lives weigh us down even more. He purposefully rejects the notion of getting close to others. Instead, he relies on acquaintances; not friends. Even his family is kept at a distance. Of course, through the duration of the film he meets someone with the potential of changing his worldview. At first she is essentially a female version of him. “Just think of me as you, only with a vagina,” she says to him at one point. Bingham has a philosophy about filling a backpack with all the things in life weighing you down but what he seems to fail to grasp (most of the time) is what’s left if all we do is avoid commitment and connections?

Now I’m not talking about the material possessions, he might be right about that one. But what’s obvious is that it is the friendships, the romances, the relationships with family that truly matter. If we abandon these, there is nothing else left. Sure we can lose our jobs but it’d be much worse to lose the people around you who are there for you when you’re down. We create so much drama every day that causes tiny rifts with those we care about. Some are fused back together and others are never the same. For whatever reason, we haven’t learned how to fully cohabitate with one another. The solution is not to follow Bingham’s example, though he might have a point.

Cherish the relationships with loved ones. Treat them like gold but at the same time balance it with care for yourself. There is a scene in Up in the Air where Bingham fires a man and points to the man’s resume. Before he started a career with the office he had worked at for decades, he had gone to school to be a chef. Bingham tells him he now has the opportunity and the time to pursue the thing that makes him happy.

Ryan Bingham isn’t supposed to be the hero of a generation, he’s just barely coasting by as the people he could have cared for are drifting further away. He’s a cautionary tale that we can get wrapped up in our own bravura and slogans and philosophies that we ignore the warning signs that life is getting away from us. How many people are stuck in jobs they hate only to get laid off and have no other apparent options? If we’re all going to sink we might as well try our best to live out our damn dreams. Otherwise what is it all for? I don’t have the answers, maybe if I keep looking I’ll find them or maybe I won’t. But I won’t work in another call center ever again.

A good film entertains you. A great film forces you to re-evaluate life and consider the possibilities therein. Up in the Air is the latter.

Tags: best of 2009, george clooney, jason reitman, jason wilson, movie reviews, movies, Reviews, up in the air
Posted in Reviews

24
Dec
2009

The O By Gollies

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Earlier this month, seven Halifax musicians, including Tiffany Naugler, Jay Methot, Tim Topping, Dan Nightingale, Nichole Wilson, Isaac Thompson and good-guy-super-hero Brad Lucknowski* (*not pictured above), banded together to create a Christmas album at a break-neck pace. The goal was to have everything on the record completed in time for the holidays.

Recorded in a few short sessions over a period of a couple of weeks, The O By Gollies first collection of Christmas classics is an eclectic mix of styles and influences. Maniacal-music-mastermind Jay Methot worked around the clock on recording, mixing and mastering the record in his apartment studio, while all-around-superstar Tiffany Naugler created the eye catching album insert.

The goal was achieved. The album was finished in time for Christmas and the group was very pleased with the results. They wanted to spread the good will and holiday cheer with you, the Unfiltered Smoke reader. Here’s the album in it’s entirety.

The O By Gollies Present: Jesus & Reindeer

Click the song titles to hear audio.

1. Jingle Bell Rock

2. Holly Jolly Christmas

3. God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen

4. Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree

5. Walking in a Winter Wonderland

6. Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas

Tags: Cheer, Christmas music, Festivus for the rest of us, Good will, Good-Year, ho ho ho, Jesus and Reindeer, O By Gollies, X-mas
Posted in Music

23
Dec
2009

The Best in Television Since 2000

8 Comments

an idiot box list by Dave Briggs

1. The Wire

Obviously this is top choice for the list, and should be the top pick for every person writing a best of television list for the 2000s. I mean Harvard is going to be teaching a course on the awesomeness of The Wire. I shouldn’t have to get into much detail as to why it is the best show of the 2000s because if you’re reading a Top Ten TV list and haven’t watched the complete series, you’re doing it wrong. No other show even comes close to the grittiness, and realism the Wire does concerning police work, drug dealing, gangsta life, and the politics of a crime infested city, such as Baltimore. The Wire is a no brainer when it comes to the best of the best.

2. Arrested Development

Another obvious choice. No other comedy that has come out in the last 10 years has had the sharp writing, brilliant acting, and overall attention to detail when it comes to story arcs. If you miss an episode, you’re shit out of luck when the next one comes on because you’ll only be able to get about half of the jokes. Again, if you’re reading a best of list, and you haven’t watched Arrested Development, you’re failing at life.

3. Curb Your Enthusiasm

Being a massive Seinfeld fan, Curb is as good as it’s going to get. I realize the Larry David that is in Curb is not the real life Larry, but I like to think it’s not far off. I saw an interview with LD where he broke character and it was unsettling that he’s not a raging asshole. The brilliance of Curb is during Larry’s day-to-day argument you can see where he’s coming from. You can get behind his argument, just as easily as the people who he’s confronting. Another element of Curb that is interesting is that it shows a bastardized version of what it is like to be the creator of a highly successful television series, and what living the day to day life in Hollywood is like. Unlike Entourage, where it’s Maxim magazine’s version of Hollywood life, there is a point of realism within Larry and the company he keeps.

4. Dexter

Something that makes Dexter so interesting is it’s a show that would never have been picked up by a network during the 80s or 90s. A show that showcases the human side of a serial killer. Not only do you see the ins and outs of what a murderer does everyday, but also you find yourself rooting for him. It has to be a very difficult show to write because the writers need to incorporate Dexter growing as a human while maintaining a stable outside of killing life, and of him brutally murdering people. Viewers should not find Dexter a sympathetic character at all but the writers are able to make him personable, funny, and just down right likeable. One fault in the show is how many fucking gruesome serial killers is Miami going to have?

5. The Colbert Report

Now it’s not a sitcom, but it is the most consistently funny show on television. Colbert has created a character so perfect for his format that when the jokes are working there isn’t anyone better. The small things, such as him taking the applause from every guest he has is an example of how perfect the character is. I remember when Colbert first started, it was so weak compared to the Daily Show. Then just a few short months later he was on top of his game and was consistently funnier. The fact he is able to follow Jon Stewart, with the same formatted show, and not remain in the shadows is enough for the Colbert Report to be apart of anyone’s best of list.

6. The Shield

The Shield is similar to Dexter where the lead character is such an awful example of a person but is still likeable. That’s pretty much where the similarities end. The writing on the Shield was predictable, and sometimes laughable. One thing that is for sure is its badassness. There are so many “holy fuck” moments in this show that is has to be considered one of the best. The story is simple: a badass gang cop in Los Angeles does whatever he wants to get his job done. Whether it is killing cops, framing gangsters, taking names and kicking ass, Vic Mackey isn’t to be fucked with. The Shield is over now and there wasn’t a weak season. Don’t expect the brilliance of the Wire while watching it, but there is no way to be disappointed. The head writer, Kurt Sutter, now works on Sons of Anarchy, which carries the same level of badassness.

7. It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia

Another FX show, which in a way is nothing more than a modern day Seinfeld. The characters are horrible, selfish people, but are relatable, and hilarious. No issue is taboo for It’s Always Sunny. In many cases it crosses the line, which is what a good comedy needs to do. If the jokes or situations are dumbed down to reach a broader audience then it’s not going to work. There is subtlety to each character, which is what makes them work. Each of the 5 main characters are self-centered, but in their own specific manners. It’s not just a case of 5 people being jerks; they are all jerks in their own special ways.

8. Extras

When Ricky Gervais has creative control he can do no wrong. Both The Office and Extras are brilliant. Each series had the sense to stop while they were ahead. Gervais doesn’t leave any questions unanswered and is able to wrap up two amazing shows with just 13 episodes. Extras noses out The Office because it is absolutely perfect. It focuses on an oblivious actor doing whatever he can to get screen time. When he does make it big, it’s a program that he doesn’t support and knows it’s not funny. The show has balls, and allows the viewer see why there are such shitty shows on major networks. The show within a show in Extras is aimed at a large demographic, and is so dumbed down that it’s unbearable. The Christmas special, where Gervais is a part of the Celebrity Edition of Big Brother is genius. If you haven’t watched this, get on it.

9. Six Feet Under

Six Feet Under is special in a way that no other series has been able to do. It makes you care about every character in the show. To say it bluntly the show is depressing as fuck but its brilliant writing by Alan Ball helps level out the depressing shit with the quirky, and the funny. The show has a real feel to it like you are just looking in on the lives of the Fisher family. Six Feet Under is able to do the impossible: take a critically acclaimed show, and end it on a high note. Very few shows are able to end the same way they started. This show ends perfectly without anything being left unanswered.

10. 30 Rock

While it’s starting to decline in quality, 30 Rock started off so strong that it deserves a spot on a top 10 list. 30 Rock does to an extent what Curb and the Larry Sanders show was able to do. It shows the backstage life of how your favourite show is created. Tina Fey is a great writer, and great comedic actors like Alec Baldwin and Tracy Morgan can bring her writing to the screen. Morgan specifically, who was barely used during his time on SNL, but when he was, he stole the show. 30 Rock is also bringing the life back to NBC’s Thursday night. The group of shows on right now is the best since Seinfeld was the 10 o’clock anchor. This show is hardly a surprise, and will likely be on many lists because it’s an Emmy magnet, and a critical darling. Sometimes those accolades are given to the right show.

Tags: 30 rock, arrested development, curb your enthusiasm, dexter, extras, it's always sunny in philadelphia, six feet under, stephen colbert, television, the colbert report, the shield, the wire
Posted in 2000's: A Decade in Review, Lists

23
Dec
2009

Jawnpee Recommends Music from the 2000s!

3 Comments

another reluctant list by John P. Rairdon

I do not envy Rolling Stone right now. A day after publishing their always controversial top 100 albums and songs of the decade there was, without a doubt, quite a ruckus from the rabble of objectors.

To make things worse Unfiltered Smoke asked me for just 10. A “top 10 of the decade”. I’m not doing that. What I am going to do is to tell you what albums I listened to most and from what year they came. Some years had several good pieces and some had none that made my list. When faced with a ‘tie’ I’ll pick the album I believe needs the props.

I did not compile this list for you to search through and match with your favs, that’s Rolling Stone’s job. I deliberately left off awesome albums by TOOL, AiC, Weezer, Blue Rodeo, Cake, Jack Johnson, Mars Volta, Muse, Queens and numerous others. Get every one of those guys’ albums too.

Nickelback: The State (2000)

I know there are haters. Fuck, I’m a hater too but this album started something. You’ll never learn to appreciate this record after the last decade’s worth of abuse from this band but this album had legs back in the day.

Days of the New: III (2001)

Marked a new, brilliant direction for Travis Meeks. It also marked the last time that fucker ever made some music. It was so good that nobody liked it which may have led to Travis becoming a TV star on TV’s Intervention and he never looked back.

Lovage: Music to Make Love to Your Old Lady By (2001)

This was made to fill the sexy void left wide open by the passing of Portishead. One track, a cover of Berlin’s big hit from the 80’s “Sex, I’m a” made me feel like I was a teenager all over again. The masturbation was good back then.

Jerry Cantrell: Degradation Trip Volumes 1 & 2 (2002)

Jerry teamed up with the original Puffy (drummer) and Trujillo (bassist) to make a masterpiece on 2 pieces of plastic. If Degradation Trip were a body of water it’d be dark, muddy and have sharp, sharp hooks once you sank in deep.

I Mother Earth: Quicksilver Meat Dream (2003)

A beautiful farewell album. Produced by David Bottrill, this album turned the band’s style on its side. Did Bottril make IME sound like TOOL or did TOOL ask to sound like David Bottril? Now, don’t think about it again because you need to focus on Quicksilver Meat Dream as there’s just too much there to process anyway.

Helmet: Size Matters (2004)

Page made a completely new band of some familiar faces and an old name. He changed his voice and sings more often than screams. Together they made some awesome, awesome songs. Not for every Helmet fan but ideal for anyone who wants to drive fast.

Gorillaz: Demon Days (2005)

I’m ashamed to admit that Danger Mouse has trumped Automator with this newer version of Gorillaz. The songs are smooth and sexy. Many styles mash up yet stay well separated. The performers are all top notch and wholly appealing.

Sean Lennon: Friendly Fire (2006)

Sometimes he uses simple words and simple rhymes and simple sounds like hand clapping. Other times it’s off the wall with strange harmonies and organs and more. I love every song on this record and I can’t say why more than this man is awesomeness.

Secret Chiefs 3 – Xaphan: The Book Of Angels, Vol. 9 (2008)

I’ve followed the Chiefs for a decade now and they can be hit or miss with their mostly instrumental recordings. This time around the compositions are written by another man, a John Zorn. Does one avant-garde band playing another man’s avant-garde music make it any better? I don’t know but I can say that it’s refreshing and enjoyable. Vol. 9 is only a small part of many other volumes Zorn wrote. All the other Volumes were performed by other avant-garde bands.

K-OS – YES! (2009)

Look, it’s 2009 right now, I have not had time to hear everything that has come out yet and be objective about it. What I can say right now is that this album works for me. Some tracks are not to my taste but the others taste so great that I endure the bad ones.

Tags: best of 2000s, days of the new, gorillaz, helmet, i mother earth, jerry cantrell, john p. rairdon, lovage, Music, nickelback, sean lennon, secret chiefs
Posted in 2000's: A Decade in Review, Lists, Reviews

21
Dec
2009

Dear Asshole: Assholes of the Decade

30 Comments

by John McIntyre

Dear Asshole: Assholes of the decade edition

Hello my friends. It’s been an interesting decade, and it’s been full of jerks. Here are my brief letters to a few of them.

Dear Stephen Harper,

I assumed that when mad scientists created evil, soulless automatons with visions of world domination, that they would have given them nicer hair and at least a passing ability to smile like a human being. I guess they were more concerned with teaching them how to sing Beatles’ tunes.

He's trapped a poor balloonfish under that tasteful texas neck-tie. But seriously, Harper wants to bring the three strike rule to Canada, ie. you get caught with a joint three times and you're thrown in jail for life. If this asshole ever gets a majority I'm moving to Holland.

Dear Sarah Palin,

Thanks for supporting the Obama campaign! Palin-Beck 2012 baby!

Jesus do I want to slap that grin off her face. Who names a child with down syndrome "Trig?" And then uses him as leverage against free healthcare for poor people? She's the fucking anti-christ, and her family is like John and Kate plus rifles, retards and an uncomfortably close proximity to professional pornography.

Dear Catholic Church,

Electing Benedict as Pope was a short-sighted decision that’s issuing in a new, and very untimely, wave of conservatism. It’s leading to the repression of women (especially nuns, who are being investigated by the Vatican because some are refusing to wear robes and others are helping AIDS victims), the disaffection of priests and parishioners, and the alienation of the liberal majority that makes up the church. Rome is out of touch. You had the opportunity to elect the first ever black Pope, and he would have finally reversed your ridiculous stance on condoms and nearly instantly saved hundreds of thousands, if not millions, of lives. But nooo, “we’ve gotta stick with tradition and keep whitey in power like God, our grand dragon, wants.” Oh yeah, electing a Nazi is a much better idea. Light up the white smoke Bartholomew, the new Reich’s a-comin! Also, there’s the gays, women and abortion thing, but I don’t want to touch on anything controversial.

HAIL MARY FULL OF LIGHTNING MOTHA FUCKA! OOO-WAH-A-AH-AH!

Dear Israel,

Anti-zionism does not equal anti-Semitism. Give Gaza and the West Bank back. Quit evicting Palestinians from Jerusalem. Stop settlement building, and bam, brown people of all different shades and nose sizes holding hands and singing “we are the world.” Most of the extremism and terrorism of the last ten years, and consequently the backlash against Muslims, is a direct reaction to your hard-line, and ironically racist, policies. Ever think that maybe the best way to fight the endless waves of suicide bombers and radicals might be to cut off the fuel that keeps their rhetoric burning? You were in the shit before, now you’re the occupiers fucking with the little guy. There’s no justification for terrorism, but there’s no justification for stealing Palestinian homes either. *Cough.* Umm, dick dick, boner. Boobs.

Terrorists will never use this as fodder to recruit poor, easily influenced, barely educated teenagers looking for someone to blame for their shit life situations. Pointing guns at children is a wonderful way to stop terrorism.

Dear Strom Thurmond,

How’s hell? Are the queers keeping you entertained with their non-stop sodomy? Thank God you finally died, you segregationist prick. How screwed up is the U.S. that you were a senator until 2003 and never renounced your pro segregationist stance against the “nigra” race? Even after you had a little illegitimate “nigra” daughter of your own? And Trent Lott, another d-bag senator who spoke about supporting your 1948 presidential run (on the keep blackie down before the reefer-mad jazz musicians impregnate all our daughters ticket) was never voted out and didn’t resign until 2007!

Little missy Thurmand. That's some good-ole Kentucky-fried irony right there.

Dear Michael Bay and Stephen Spielberg,

Steve, you’re often blamed for ruining film by inventing the blockbuster and gearing Hollywood toward illiterate 14 year-olds with a penchant for dick jokes. Kind of true. I can’t really fault you for it, especially since I’m a 22-year old with a penchant for dick jokes. But you just couldn’t stop with Jaws. You and Lucas decided it’s better to whore yourselves out for a cash grab then to leave what would have been a great film legacy well enough alone. I mean Aliens? ALIENS?! It’s Indiana fucking Jones, not spaceman spiff you fuck. To use the cliche, Fonzi jumped the shark, Tom Cruise jumped the couch, and you sir, have nuked the fridge.

Mikey, you started out well. The Rock was awesome, and Bad Boys was at least watchable. But then you decided that “aww hell naw” and robot testicles were good substitutes for plot and character. Congratulations, you’re the patriarch of film making’s second generation of failure, and you helped create the climate that made Indiana Jones and the Geriatrics Who Need a Paycheque possible. You’re like a sick dog, eating shit to make yourself puke. And we, the ignorant masses, just keep returning to the trough to gobble down your regurgitated mess of defeat and Martin Lawrence.

Pictured – Puke Shit, with a side of Hitler mustache.

Dear evil Disney empire,

Hilary Duff, Hannah Montana, the Jonas Brothers. I liked you better when you were corrupting children with overtly racist cartoons. Although I suppose the incredible whiteness of that auto tuned synth-pop crap is probably still racist somehow.

Geessum massa, them boysus pants sho' is paw-ful tight!

Dear Capitalism,

Adam Smith didn’t picture gigantic corporations when he was lobbying for the free hand of the market, he was talking about small, localized cottage industries, so all you fiscal conservative assholes can quit quoting him to justify lining your pockets. Capitalism only works on the small scale or when it’s heavily regulated, like it was in the U.S. from the 40s through to the start of the 80s. Then Reagan came along and started to deregulate it. Then Bush deregulated it further. Then Clinton teamed up with Arsenio Hall and used the market to create a secret platinum saxophone that dispenses blowjobs (or something like that, I was busy playing Duke Nukem in the 90s) and we all know what happened with W. The last twenty years has been a great era of short-sighted speculation, and we should have known that it would end where it did. The public watched a bubble burst and inflated it again, hoping that forcing more air in would prevent its explosion the second time around. The guys making money knew exactly what would happen. And it’ll happen again, because the market is still far less regulated then it has been at any time in the past. So bite on to the tail end of the recession everybody, I hope you like the taste of your own asshole. We’re all screwed until we wise up and stop putting shit on credit cards.

It's cyclical, get it?

Dear American Evangelical Christians,

Capitalism can’t work alone, it needs a bunch of self righteous, ignorant assholes to help push it along. Even if I exclude your douchiness and the damage you do on the small scale by ruining your own children, your lobbying and voting choices alone are enough to have majorly screwed up not just North America, but the whole goddamn world. I don’t know how incredible dickery to the poor and moronic allegiance to rich assholes has become so ingrained in Christianity, but it is and we’re fucked because of it. You share a huge chunk of guilt for the wars, the recession, the extremism going on in Europe and the Middle East, and the racism that’s building across the world because of that extremism. The clash of civilizations is largely your fault, and you’re too Goddamn stupid to realize that you’ve been on the wrong side of history for the last century. Christianity used to be a counter culture and for a long time large chunks of it were dedicated to doing good. Then a couple of dicks started building mega-churches and slapped their ball-sweat onto paper, writing books like “A Purpose Driven Life.” Your religion is like Scientology and the Catholic Church before it is nothing more than a way for rich white men to profit off of people’s guilt and stupidity. Thanks a lot fuckwads. You’re what the Mayans warned us about.

Oh kids, always so rambunctious and full of hate.

Dear Fox News (and all right wing media outlets, including Canadian ones),

And you spurred them on. You’re kind of the culmination of everything wrong on this list. Your pandering “journalism” is entirely motivated by money. You feed your audience what it wants to hear, try to give it a good scare and do your best to impose that great American belief that any fact or logical argument, no matter how iron clad, can be disproven as long as someone yells loud enough. Climate-gate is a great example. Despite near unanimous agreement among all researchers across the entire scientific community, despite piles of hard data that shows a distinct warming trend and despite the fact that the last decade is the warmest in the earth’s entire history, you’ve managed to convince millions of people (and 40 per cent of Canadians according to one non-scientific pole) that climate change isn’t real. Why? Because someone found a few emails between researchers that talked about how stupid climate change deniers are. Then you went out and found every nut and unqualified hack you could to support your theory—and misquoted as many real scientists as possible—all the while disregarding the statements from NASA, the UN, countless NGOs and think tanks, and the Federal governments of Canada, the US, Britain and several other countries.

"Yeah, 'Global warming.' Why don't you tree-huggers all go smoke some marijuana cigarettes while you drink vegan-lattes with all your communist boyfriends back in France? Fuckin' hippies. Where's the remote, I need to watch a 200 pound man put his hands on a 500 pound man's choda." (Denying global warming, calling gays evil and supporting the ability of insurance companies to cancel coverage whenever they want nets Beck about $23 million a year)

Dear Barry Bonds,

Don’t care if Michael Vick feeds teletubbies to dogs or TO is an all-round chipotle flavoured cock, you only earned your records because of steroids and you’ve helped make major league sports illegitimate. You’re like the Richard Nixon of pro athletes. Except worse—at least he was a great athlete bowler.

Paul Blart hates cheaters.

Tags: assholes of the decade, barry bonds, catholic church, dear asshole, decade retrospective, evangelism, fox news, glenn beck, pope benedict, sarah palin, stephen harper
Posted in 2000's: A Decade in Review, Op-Ed

20
Dec
2009

The Best in Non-fiction of the 2000s.

1 Comment

a literary list by Amy Anderson

You can visit Amy’s blog at inwoodstock.blogspot.com

Since these lists all seem to contain a disclaimer, here’s mine: I like big books and I cannot lie. Metaphorically big, as in big ideas, and literally big, as in over 500 pages. I’ve divided them into categories for ease of sorting and my apologies if I’ve overlooked something essential. Out of the thousands of books published and the dozens I read, here are the best, happy reading!

History

1. Guns, Germs and Steel (Jared Diamond)

Polymath Jared Diamond tackles the question “Why did Europeans travel to other continents with a colonial agenda, instead of Africans, South Americans or Polynesians”? The answers, of course, are partly found in the title, but Diamond’s brilliant research weaves together geography, evolutionary history, cultural customs, animal husbandry, and technology into a fascinating portrait of the world as it developed from the dawn of agriculture to the present. Apparently the sequel, titled “Collapse” is also noteworthy, but sadly I haven’t read it.

2. The Great War for Civilization (Robert Fisk)

Fisk is a journalist’s journalist. He scorns the notion of being ‘embedded’ with the troops and brings his readers hair-raisingly close to the many conflicts of the Middle East. Fisk is also a keen historian, and his book details the folly of foreign intervention (from Lawrence of Arabia to Tony Blair). He writes with a great sense of irony and never forgets to tell the stories of ordinary people caught up in conflicts beyond their making or control. Well worth the read for anyone who wonders how the Middle East got to the point it’s at now.

3. Genghis Khan (John Man)

I bought this book on my way home from Hong Kong and nearly finished it by the time my plane landed. Genghis Khan presided over the largest continuous land empire in human history, united squabbling Mongol tribes into a ruthless fighting force feared by the Chinese and the Europeans alike, advanced literacy, fostered the development of the Silk Road, and could shoot an arrow nearly 2km’s while riding a horse. But you should read it yourself, it’s thrilling.

Paris, 1919. (Margaret MacMillan)

This book goes especially well with Fisk’s. MacMillan dissects the Paris peace conference after WWI. In addition to the punitive measures levied against Germany, this conference also redrew the map in many parts of the world, fuelling ethnic conflicts, wars and demonstrating that history is written by the victors.

Ideas

I’ve always loved thinking, and reading about other people’s ideas. My top five this decade:

1.The Shock Doctrine (Naomi Klein)

This book was a terrifying read, especially the opening chapters about the CIA brain experiments in Montreal in the 1950’s. Klein discusses the beginnings of ’shock therapy’ and scientists’ disastrous attempts to unmake and re-assemble the human identity. She then takes on Milton Friedman and neo-liberal economists, explaining that many of their policies were implemented by using the the language of ’shock therapy,’ followed by brutal political repression. She closes with discussion of how the newest economic developments are occurring in war-torn countries, where multi-national corporations often dominate dysfunctional national governments. This book took a lot of courage to write and read, I won’t lie.

2.Original Minds (Elanor Wachtel)

CBC Radio’s finest interviewer relives interviews with some of the finest minds of the 20th century, including Noam Chomsky, Bernardo Bertolucci, Jane Jacobs, Amaryta Sen, Jane Goodall and many more. The book contains transcripts of the interviews and is a tasty smorgasboard of ideas from different fields, which is a refreshing change from the single-topic tome.

3. The City of Words (Alberto Maguel)

Alberto Manguel is an Argentinian ex-pat formerly from Toronto, now living in France. This book is a transcript of the Massey Lectures he gave in 2007, in which he argues that words, language, story-telling and reading are the keys to identity, both individual and collective. Manguel takes his examples from ancient literature (the Epic of Gilgamesh), to modern literature (Doblin’s Berlin Alexanderplatz) to Inuit Film (Atanarjuat, the Fast Runner), and weaves them together to show us that we are the stories we tell.

4. Infidel (Ayan Hirsi Ali)

Like many people, I have become increasingly interested in the Muslim world. Ayan Hirsi Ali grew up in tribal Somalia and recounts her life, relatives and her decision to avoid arranged marriage, risk her life and move to the Netherlands. As a Muslim speaking out against Wahhabi fundamentalism, she was under death threats and police protection. Ali gives a courageous first-hand account of what Muslim life is like for many girls and women living in Somalia, Saudi Arabia and other fundamentalist countries. Heartbreaking at times, but ultimately a testament to one woman’s quest for freedom.

5. Evolve Your Brain (Joe Dispenza)

And to conclude the category…a book about neuroscience. Dispenza is a chiropractor by trade, but he’s studied neuro-biology, brain evolution and the interaction between brain and body. Beginning with the fascinating story of how he healed his own spine after being hit by an SUV travelling 55mph, this book shows how the brain works, how thought patterns are created, how we can become addicted physiologically to our own thoughts, and how we can use intention and the frontal lobe to change our behaviour. Our thoughts create our realities, read all about it!

Tags: amy anderson, books, education, history, ideas, information, non-fiction, the other side of town, words
Posted in 2000's: A Decade in Review, Lists, Reviews

18
Dec
2009

The Definitive, Indisputable and Infallible List of the Unquestionably Best Rock Music of the 2000’s

8 Comments

a list by Isaac Thompson (Who holds these truths to be self-evident)

**********

Disclaimer: There has been a little bit of controversy over these “Decade in Review” lists we’ve been posting. Some of our contributors have been getting flack for posting their opinions and I don’t think that’s fair. I know a lot of people say that if you post something on the internet you’re asking for criticism, but I say that’s horseshit. How do I know that? I know because I am directly asking for criticism.

I’m the type who is right tickled by controversy and I aim to start some. I could challenge you to tell me I’m wrong about my own opinion, but I’ll make it even easier for you. This isn’t simply my opinion; this is indisputable fact sent from the heavens and engraved in stone tablets. I’m 100% correct in all of my choices and I dare you to challenge me on it. That’s right, I dare you. To all you haters, trolls, know-it-alls, MENSA members, freemasons, PETA supporters, Dane Cook fans and armchair critics, I dare you to challenge me in the comments section below. I will gladly drill you a new one, you fucking sissies

Even if you agree with what I have to say and haven’t noticed all of the grammatical and/or spelling errors I’ve carefully littered this article with, I still dare you to challenge my authority. Bring it on, but be warned, you will be verbally eviscerated by yours truly and I’m a cruel sonovabitch.

Your suffering will be legendary….even in hell!

**********

THE TEN BEST ROCK ALBUMS OF THE OUGHTS

(in whatever order I please.)

Ryan Adams – Heartbreaker

(2000)

Not the most rockin’ album on my list in terms of volume, but it’s dripping an unmatched angst and sadness that you can almost feel just by touching the disc. Heartbreaker is without a doubt my pick for the best album of the decade. Maybe even the best ‘tear-in-your-beer’, ‘music-to-slit-your-wrists-to’ album ever conceived. It’s got all the sensitivity of his lame-duck imitators who litter the radio these days combined with Adams’ awe inspiring passion. He is a song writing tour de force (I highly recommend all of his albums) and Heartbeaker is the record where all of his stars aligned.

Songs like “My Winding Wheel”, “Oh My Sweet Carolina” and “Damn Sam (I Love a Woman That Rains)” are striking in their beauty. The Old Fashioned rockers “To Be Young (is to be sad, is to be high)” and “Shakedown on 9^th Street” are sure to have you stomping your feet and singing along at the top of your lungs. The album’s centerpiece “Come Pick Me Up” is one of the greatest songs of all time and shows off Adams’ talent for capturing heartbreak with simplicity and profound honesty.

The record has a stripped down quality that backs its broken hearted sentiment perfectly. If you’re freshly dumped and alone for the holidays, pick up a copy of this amazing record. It will be your best friend.

The Decemberists – The Crane Wife

(2006)

The Decemberists’ main songwriter Colin Meloy is a goddamned genius. His songs are filled with rich imagery laden lyrics that touch on folklore, history and the human condition. The Crane Wife is an absolutely amazing album. If it were released 30 years ago it would be held with the same regard as Pink Floyd’s “Dark Side of The Moon”. The album veers all over the place while remaining a singular coherent vision. There is the Folky duet “Yankee Bayonet”, the three part rock opera “The Island”, the bombastic “When the War Came” the cool and playful “Perfect Crime”, the poppy, sugar-coated gems “O Valencia!” and “Summersong”, as well as haunting numbers like “Shankill Butchers”. The Crane Wife is an album that demands you listen to it again and again, but fear not, you will be greatly rewarded if you comply.

The Arctic Monkeys – Whatever People Say I am, That’s What I’m Not

(2006)

Who knew a concept album about a night of clubbing would be the most electric, vital album of the decade? In terms of pure fuck-you-attitude and explosive youthful energy, nothing comes close to this record. It has a similar attention demanding combustibility of Nirvana’s “Nevermind” and The Sex Pistol’s “Nevermind the Bullocks…”. In a decade when a lot of good rock bands limped into obscurity and shit like Nickelback ruled all, these young British snots showed us what rock-and-fucking-roll is all about. It ain’t about wearing expensive leather clothes and singing ballads to teenage girls, it ain’t about musical merit and complexity either. It’s about passion, honesty, and true grit. Rock and roll has everything to do with attitude and the Arctic Monkeys are true ambassadors of ass-kicking attitude in the 21st century!

Fuck you!

Jimmy Eat World – Bleed American

(2001)

I present an album of 100% Perfect, heartfelt and inspired pop rock. Jimmy Eat World are a heart on their sleeve kind of band, but what separates them from the pack is they are sincere about their sincerity. It isn’t just a pose or a marketing gimmick, it’s total unfiltered earnestness that is hardly ever seen in these oh-so-ironic times full of above-it-all smarty pants (That’s right, I’m talking about you, why don’t you whine about it in the comments section, I dare you). Jimmy Eat World seem like the kind of guys who have the balls to truly acknowledge their emotions, I’ll bet they aren’t even afraid to cry (btw, the reason you’re afraid to cry is because of your small cock). On top of that, when Jimmy Eat World swings the rock hammer down they bring it down hard, proving they can be as aggressive as they are sensitive.

Hawksley Workman – Lover/Fighter

(2003)

In order to write and record Lover/Fighter, Hawksley Workman shut himself off from society, living and recording in an old abandoned schoolhouse in the middle of winter. The funny thing is, it isn’t the sombre claustrophobic affair you’d expect. It’s a big heaping handful of epic stadium ready rock. Why this album isn’t better known is beyond me. It’s Workman’s finest, most cohesive record and is overflowing with big catchy hooks. If you haven’t heard the genre bending track “Smoke Baby”, I suppose you should.

Muse – Absolution

(2003)

Muse have a lot to boast about. If I had to describe their sound I’d say it’s Radiohead meets Rage Against the machine, only cooler. They sing about cool subject matter such as Armageddon, the rapture, conspiracies, god and obsession. They show off expert playing, soaring vocals, giant hooks…there isn’t a single thing about this album that isn’t awesome.

Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds – No More Shall We Part

(2001)

Nick Cave is incapable of becoming irrelevant. His music has always been important and it always will be. Cave ventures into uncharted territory with this beautiful and compelling collection of songs. It’s a slow burn of a record and that makes it all the more rewarding. It contains classics such as “God is in the House” and “Fifteen Feet of Pure White Snow”. The narration of this album is totally inspired and full of those wonderful idiosyncrasies that only Cave can pull off.

Pearl Jam – Pearl Jam

(2006)

Pearl Jam’s self titled album (affectionately known to fans as “Avocado”) brought the big anthems and electric aggression (that they had previously been shying away from) back to their music. And the boys weren’t fooling around. The first single “World Wide Suicide” (a big “fuck you” to the architects of war) was such a sorely needed injection of awesome that it dominated rock radio for weeks. Pearl Jam reclaimed all that was rightfully theirs from the Theory of a Nickelcreeds. They showed those young whippersnappers how it’s done.

One of the best albums from one of the best bands ever. ‘Nuff said.

Tegan & Sara – The Con

(2007)

I can’t say enough good things about Tegan and Sara. To know them is to love them and if you don’t know them, shame on you. Tegan and Sara have an amazing talent for making incredible music and then something up with something even better a couple years later. I almost put their new album “Sainthood” on my list because it might be a better record, but I’ve spent more hours listening to The Con. I’ve already said my piece about “Sainthood” which you can read here.

The Con is an album full of atmosphere and heartbreak, but also of strength. Tegan and Sara songs are never content to wallow; they display a survivor attitude in the face of an eloquently described despair and it makes their music all the more powerful. The Con features expertly constructed pop melodies with often sparse arrangements, lyrics so profound they’ll rip your heart out, angelic vocal melodies, and lots of that rock and roll attitude.

I’m in love with this band and if you try and slag them I will be merciless.

The White Stripes – Icky Thump

(2007)

Really, every single White Stripes album belongs on this list. They’re all equally awesome. The only reason I chose Icky Thump over the others was the mood I was in today. If I were to write this list tomorrow it might include “Get Behind Me Satan” instead, or “Elephant”, or “White Blood Cells”…point is the White Stripes are the best new rock band of the 2000s and all of their albums are equally brilliant.

The White Stripes are a band with a vision, they have the colour scheme, the recurring topics (all of their albums reference redheaded women, and all contain a song titled “Little _____”), and fantastic music videos. Meg’s childish sometimes off-time drumming perfectly compliments Jack’s rat-in-a-cage attack. Jack White’s lyrics are clever and at times have a stream of consciousness feel. His passion is unquestionable, and his song writing is as important as Kurt Cobain, Bruce Springsteen, Bob Dylan…you name it.

The White Stripes are the band of the decade. This isn’t so much an argument for the album Icky Thump as much as it’s an argument for the entire White Stripes catalogue. Long Live Jack and Meg!

Tool – Lateralus

(2001)

Ah, Tool, the only band in the world that can wait 5 or 6 years between albums and still have everyone and their dog clambering for them. Lateralus strolls up the next logical step from their previous record Ænima yet is still full of surprises. The album is one big sweeping, tense epic punctuated with orgasmic payoffs.

Maynard James Keenan is indisputably the best damn voice in rock and roll and he uses every trick at his disposal in this masterpiece of a record; never before or since has such challenging anti-pop, art-rock been so listenable and approachable. Danny Carey’s drumming is…well Danny Carey’s drumming. There are no words for how fantastic this guy is, just shut up and listen to him. Adam Jones’ Guitar work is otherworldly. His guitar sounds more like transmissions from hell than a mere six-string. Justin Chancellor shows off complex bass-lines that do anything but bleed into the background.

Every member of the band shines and they chug ahead like a well oiled machine. There is no single force in tool that outweighs the other. They are truly the sum off all their parts. Everything about Lateralus is a work of art. Even the liner notes are mind-blowing. Lateralus is an album that requires headphones, solitude and reflection. No kidding, this shit will change your life.

Honourable Mentions: Deftones – White Pony, A Perfect Circle – Mer de Noms, Days of the New – Red, System of a Down – Mezmerize/Hypnotize, Queens of The Stone Age – Songs for the Deaf, The stokes – Is This It, Wintersleep – Welcome to The Night Sky, Coheed and Cambria – Good Apollo: I’m Burning Star IV, Modest Mouse – Good News For People Who Love Bad News

and Yes, I’m aware that my top ten list contains 11 albums. What are you gonna do about it?……That’s what I thought.

Tags: 2000s, decade in review, I am right and you are wrong, isaac thompson, rock music, top ten
Posted in 2000's: A Decade in Review, Lists, Reviews

17
Dec
2009

Christmas vs. “Xmas”: The Ho-Ho-Holocaust

3 Comments

Christmas vs. “Xmas”: The Ho-Ho-Holocaust
(or, since this is much ado about nothing, it could be the Ho-Ho-Hoo-raw!)
(or, How the loudest-portions-of-the-largest-minority think we should greet each other.) by Matt Jones

The debate over the proper holiday greeting has gone on for some time now. “Merry Christmas,” or “Happy Holidays?” Is one exclusionist? Is the other un-American (in the larger North American sense) in a largely Christian part of the world?

I’ve heard some rumblings about this: the odd article here, and an overheard conversation there. Of course, one of the most vocal and hilarious proponents is Stephen Colbert, who wishes PC death on anyone who says “Happy Holidays.” However, as with most things Colbert says, there’s a good chance that in his heart he means the complete opposite.

I got a good chuckle out of this recent installment of Shortpacked, a webcomic about people who work in a toy store. (click to enlarge)

My chuckles stopped when I thought: wait a minute, is that a real website? I typed in www.standforchristmas.com, and what do you know — it is real. If we secular atheists can deign to look at it, it’s a fascinating read.

For our purposes here, let’s look specifically at Wal-Mart. The first thing we can determine is that either Wal-Mart’s corporate rules and regulations are, at best, poorly enforced across their various locations, or these people are liars. After numerous entries complaining that Wal-Mart had no nativity scenes, no Christian-themed cards, and the clerks did not say, “Merry Christmas,” I came across this comment:

I saw nativity scenes available in the store in Edgewood, NM. Also, the Christmas cards they stocked are the most Christ-friendly I have ever seen. (”May your Christmas center around the fact that Jesus was born” said one) – also employees said Merry Christmas. They even had a little lighted Christmas Walmart-building with a salvation army bell ringer in the front of the building on sale for $12. Definitely Christmas friendly.

Compare that to the experience of this person, who seems to have discovered a few additional soap boxes under his or her feet:

I recently was shopping in the local Wal-Mart and noticed the absence of Christmas music while they eagerly sought out my shopping dollars. I was told by an associate that corporate would not allow it because it “offended” certain people. I can only assume it offended atheists and the ACLU who are the usual culprits in this debate.

Those evil ACLU bastards! How dare they! Nonetheless, it seems that there’s no consistency (or effectiveness) in how Wal-Mart applies its corporate decisions. Not every comment is as much a non-sequitur as that one, though. Some are downright, well, logical and Christian:

While the clerks were friendly, no one wished us a Merry Christmas and there are no Chistmas decorations or other indications of this holiday showing in No. Attlrboro, MA. We will continue to greet the staff at Wal-Mart with Merry Christmas and hope that the spirit of this holy holiday will come to Wal-mart.

I think this next one is being facetious, though:

[My] Wal-Mart had the nerve to have “Chanukah” stuff for sale and a sign that said “Happy Chanukah.” How Rude!!

Of course, others will use the forum to make non-related, but still valid points:

There is nothing Christmasy about smothering small businesses and contributing to domestic unemployment by encouraging overseas manufacturing.

I think that this is the most telling one of all:

It’s just business as usual for Wal-Mart. This giant retailer should set an example and show reverence and respect for this HOLY season as it is the core reason for their prosperity in this time.

Now we’re getting somewhere. Wal-Mart should celebrate Christianity during the holidays because of how much money it makes from it? Seems logical. Why has this logic not been applied to the fact that Christmas (the annual celebration of the birth of Christ) and, let’s call it Xmas (the annual tradition of buying yourself into debt and eating yourself into some cardiac excitement) have nothing to do with each other?

I don’t recall any Bible verses encouraging commercialism in celebration of the birth of Jesus. If anyone should be getting presents, it’s he. Trying to combine Christmas and Xmas might just lead to a mental disconnect in those kids you’re trying to raise “right.”

I know that for me, everything seemed to be geared toward presents; hearing about Jesus being born was just an irritation to deal with while at mass on Christmas Eve or Christmas morning. I didn’t have anything against Jesus, but for a five-year-old kid, toys were (and are) far more interesting and important than uncomfortable church clothes and sitting quietly.

But that’s not even the real issue here. The real issue is the idea many people seem to have — that Christmas, as the seasonal holiday celebrated by the largest minority, should be monolithic. It is the idea that other religious celebrations around this time of year (among them Kwanzaa, Hanukkah, occasionally roaming celebrations such as Ramadan, and my personal favourites, Festivus and the Feast of Alvis) are irrelevant in the grand scheme of things because they aren’t celebrated by the largest group (or, more destructively, aren’t celebrated because what those people believe is wrong). In essence, it’s the idea that the inclusive “Happy Holidays” greeting is a slap in the face of baby Jesus.

The fact is (and I know that I’m getting into dangerous territory here), the dominance of Christianity (not necessarily the religion itself, but what people have used it for) is offensive to a lot of people. Christian values (the Ten Commandments, for example) are a fine system on which to base one’s life; I don’t believe that anyone has a problem with that. The trouble comes when the richest landowners in the entire world use their moral and political influence to discourage the use of condoms to prevent the spread of AIDS in Africa, or quietly relocate child molesters who’ve abused their position of moral authority. Or how about those, believers or not, who take advantage of the faithful in order to sell garbage such as this? Christianity, like anything else, has proven very destructive when in the wrong hands.

But I’m just one guy (who, admittedly, cared more as a child about He-Man than Jesus). What do you think? How should we greet one another this time of year? Should nativity scenes be displayed publicly? Can the other religions hash it out in hell for all eternity? You tell me.

Herry Christadays!

Tags: christmas, christmas carols, consumerism, faith, matt jones, prayercross, religion, religious freedom, wal-mart, xmas
Posted in Essays, Op-Ed

16
Dec
2009

Jawnpee Recommends Movies from the 00s!

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a reluctant list by John P. Rairdon

Introduction: I’m not one for top lists. I’m not one for saying something was the best but I have from time to time claimed something was better than another thing. This list consists of films that I have watched that I liked. They are the first 15 that came to mind when I thought about the subject. Listed in chronological order.

Fight Club (1999)

Yes, made in 1999 and if you make any bones about it I’ll fight you. This movie was so fucking important that even until 2004 I was still watching it monthly. If anything ever helped a group of kids make their transition through millenniums, this fucking film was the man. It taught us so much and made us care so little and question everything all the while inspiring us to love every moment we had alive. Fearlessness is the message.

3000 Miles to Graceland (2001)

Was Kevin Costner’s Roadhouse only cooler with cooler lines, cooler actors, cooler characters, cooler scenes and sexier girls? It had a stupid final resolution and that brings it down a bit but I’ll be damned if it wasn’t fun and all that other stuff I said.

My House in Umbria (2003)

Truth be told, I don’t remember much about this movie except I watched it every day it played on pay-per-view. Something about an old woman and some train wreck survivors. Dame Maggie Smith is old but still very much beautiful and she is all the reason I need to put this movie here in the list.

Bad Santa (2003)

Maybe it didn’t pave the way for inappropriate films but it painted new lines on the highway. At its time, this movie pressed some taboo buttons. Bad Santa shocked the shit out of you ’till you couldn’t walk right for a month. Plus, every step of the way it was hilarious. Absolutely gold. It starred that chick from Gilmore Girls, which was shocking on its own. It also has that musician, Billy Bob so-and-so.

House of Sand and Fog (2003)

A depressing, downer of a film with a very capable cast, young and old alike. The story is crazy in the way things spiral down to despair. Sir Ben Kingsley is a marvel to behold. There is great span of emotions embodied throughout this film’s progression and every one only makes the viewer more concerned. That’s the beauty of this piece. It made me care. I knew I didn’t agree with the way anybody handled anything they did but I was so worried for everyone because they were all doing it wrong.

Kill Bill Vol. 2 (2004)

I saw Vol. 1 on DVD on a literal small screen. It was fun and gory. Didn’t stop any trains and I doubt I told my family about it but it made me hop into the car when a gang was going to see Vol 2 at the local film joint.

*orgasm*

Now that is storytelling. That is action with feeling. That movie has soul. It is emotional. It’s sad with sad characters. It was hilarious and pure. Scary and heart wrenching. It has that trademark Tarantino dialog. It has brilliant music by Robert Rodriguez. It has David Fucking Carradine as the mother fucking man. Don’t you ever forget it.

I used to work at a grocery store down the road from the moving picture house. I used to get off my late night shift and run (I had no car) straight to theatre and catch the last 40 minutes of the movie. I did that all week.

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang (2005)

Do you remember Casablanca? Did you ever notice how very little seemed to happen but everybody had something to say about it? That movie was a a masterpiece of dialogue. I can’t put Casablanca on this list but I can put Kiss Kiss Bang Bang on it. Kiss Kiss Bang Bang is not Casablanca. For one it has far more action, but the dialogue is incredible. I’ll admit it uses a narrator and that’s not Casa-class but don’t hold it against it because it does have Val Kilmer as big gay man with dry humour. Kiss Kiss is another spectacular Robert Downey Jr. film and should be seen by everybody who likes awesome things.

Lucky Number Slevin (2006)

Even if Lucky Number Slevin didn’t have the rockstar cast, the compelling characters, the rich interactions between those characters and the great story I would still be here telling you to watch this joint because the set design of this film goes beyond anything I can describe. The wall paper is magic. The glass bricks are colorful and metal fab wall coverings are boss. Lucky for you, Slevin has all that shit and Josh Hartnett.

Shopgirl (2005) and Broken Flowers (2005)

I’ll lump the last 2 in together. Both are mostly sad, awkward films that feature sad, awkward, aging comedians playing sad, awkward characters. Steve Martin wrote and played in Shopgirl along with Claire Danes and is less awkward than Bill Murray who played in Broken Flowers. Both Films have some charming and funny moments but they almost always come from other sources than the comedians who star in them. The supporting casts are what propel these films. No doubt Broken Flowers is better but the character of Jeremy (Jason Schwartzman) in Shopgirl is worth the sit through. Likewise Murray’s detective obsessed neighbour (Jeffrey Wright) was rich.

Read any good movies lately?

In the early 2000’s I was exposed to many foreign language films and they were all awesome possum. I’mma hit you with a few because you need to know there’s more out there than Ben Stiller, Vince Vaughn and comic book adaptations.

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon (2000)

10 years ago this film was un-fucking believable. Out-fucking-rageous. It’s like China was sending a big F U to the Matrix style department.

“You can bend backwards to dodge bullets? Well we can walk on effing trees!”

So many things about this movie is magic but mostly it is the magic that makes this movie. People behave in ways that we can recognize and yet they do things better, farther, longer and easier than you or I could. They lift bigger hammers, they jump wider rivers and they fall down harder. And their flashback sequence lasts 20 minutes. Take that Family Guy.

Lucía y el sexo (Sex and Lucia) (2001)

Hold your breath, there’s lots of sex in this movie, shoot, there’s even a little nip on the official poster. The best part about this movie is the fact that despite all the sex it has a quite good story too boot. It’s a super example of dramatic irony. You know, when characters are doing stuff they think no one else will know about and we know better all along. It’s also fun to see the older depiction of the internet. All the keyboards go “clackity clack”. Fuck man, there are some nice tits in this movie but you will not feel like you watched a porno by the time it’s done.

Cidade de Deus (City of God) (2002)

Caught me off guard. It’s set in a most depressing city and has some incredible twists and turns. I was drawn to every bad decision that these children made. It is always shocking to see films with children behaving more adult than I at times, and not in good ways. With every bit of my North American, first world ignorance I ask with such force “WHERE ARE THESE KIDS’ PARENTS THROUGHOUT ALL THIS?!”

Heaven (2002)

I loved Sam Raimi’s The Gift. I payed attention to the fact that both Cate Blanchett and Giovanni Ribisi were in it. So when I heard there was a foreign film with those two together again I was curious to see it. A women attempts to exact revenge on an evil business man. It goes badly wrong and she turns herself in to the authorities. There are those films that once you finish watching you just sit there in silence. Heaven did that to me.

Irréversible (2002)

You will never, never be able to unsee this movie. Maybe now, in the years post 2002 this movie will be less shocking but I will never forget that brilliant, ugly, disgusting piece of perfect art presented in this film.

I hate this movie for the truths it presents. I hate this movie for the amazing techniques it uses to manipulate me. I hate this movie for its satisfying and heart warming ending. I hate this movie for ever having watched it. What I hate most about this movie is that after having seen everything I saw, in the order I was made to see it that I would have done the same fucking thing that I hated to see in the first 10 minutes if it happened to me.

Challenge yourself. Stomach the whole film.

Tags: 2000, bad santa, best movies of the decade, best of 2000s, brad pitt, city of god, crouching tiger hidden dragon, fight club, heaven, irreversible, john p. rairdon, Lists, movies, my house in umbria, oughts, top lists
Posted in 2000's: A Decade in Review, Lists, Reviews

14
Dec
2009

Favourite Music Since 2000

6 Comments

a personal list by Tyler Aikens

So my friend Jason has asked me to do a short write-up of my top 10 records over the past decade (that’s 1999-2009 folks! *ed. note: technically 2000-2009 is ten years. Just saying.) for Unfiltered Smoke. To be honest, it has proven to be more difficult than I expected for a number of reasons.

For starters, deciding on the top 10 over the last 10 years is a feat of its own. On average that’s one great album for every 12 months. Secondly, most of the records that have become prevalent in my life were released way back in 1998, a year behind the cut off. These include Turbonegro’s party-inducing “Apocalypse Dudes”, Dr. Octagon’s LSD-inspired self-titled record, The Refused’s genre-defining “The Shape of Punk to Come” (whose inspiration becomes more obvious with every passing year) and “Water and Solutions” by Far, an album I found at a second-hand shop and it changed my relationship with music forever. I guess I can save them for a “top 20 of the last 20 years” (here’s a hint: the early 90s blow the late 90s out of the water!).

Another personal goal with this article I had a problem with was coming up with an eclectic mix of albums so I didn’t end up with a genre list. For the past five or six years my music collection has been dominated by the work of many a hardcore punk group. While my love for such an angry and violent style of music may be a point of pride, Unfiltered Smoke deserves better.

So here it is. In no specific order, my 10 favourite records released in the past 10 years (so far of course, who knows what the rest of December may bring).

Moneen – “The Theory of Harmonial Value” (2001)

Before it became the meme we all know and hate, emo music was a small but expanding genre of punk written by guys who didn’t like the violence of hardcore or the anger of punk so instead stuck to nerdy pop punk with an ear for technical musicianship, personal lyrics and individuality. As underrated as they are, Moneen is and always has been the best at doing all of that and “Theory” is their Sistine Chapel. Unfortunately, they’re also the band that began the annoying trend of absurdly long song titles.

Highlight: Tonight, I’m Gone/ Jesus Ate My Homework”

Minus the Bear – “Highly Refined Pirates” (2002)

Speaking of bands with absurd song titles. If you ever come across this record, take a look at the track list. Some of them are even named after Starship Troopers quotes (movie quote song titles being another fad gone completely out of control). Nonetheless, Minus the Bear is another influential yet underappreciated rock band that is hardly mentioned enough in terms of importance in popular music today. Labelling them is near impossible, but it’s accurate to say they play dreamy, indie pop rock Phish fans would appreciate.

Highlight: “Thanks for the Killer Game of Crisco Twister”

Seafood – “When Do We Start Fighting…” (2001)

When friends discuss “the best British rock bands ever” it saddens me that Seafood is never brought up. I’ve met very few people who even know who they are despite the fact that the brit-pop group has been a band since 1996 and toured the US with Dashboard Confessional during the latter’s hey day. Seafood’s work post- and pre- “When Do We…” is less than satisfactory, but here they compose some of the most moving, obscure and aggressive pop rock songs I’ve ever heard.

Highlight: “Western Battles”

Soul Control – “Involution” (2007)
The Warriors – “Beyond the Noise” (2006)

I’m going to write one paragraph for these two albums because 1) I’m running on a deadline and I’m far behind and 2) I love both albums for almost the exact same reasons. Both are great hardcore albums heavily influenced by the post-hardcore bands of the 90s (like Helmet, Jawbox or Quicksand) but what truly sets these two records apart from the rest of the scene is passionate and spiritual lyricism. So refreshing! “Involution’s” themes tend to revolve around self-reflection and spiritual awakening, whereas The Warriors’ record is a lyrically told coming-of-age tale based on Herman Hesse’s “Siddartha” – the story of a young man looking for the meaning of life, and in doing so finds the meaning which he posseses within.

Highlights: SC – “Focus”, TW – “Awakened”

The Sword – “Age of Winters” (2006)

In the documentary “Metal: A Headbanger’s Journey”, Rob Zombie says something along the lines of how most metal today sucks because Black Sabbath already wrote all the best riffs. This was obviously said before “Age of Winters” was released because this shit is epic. The Sword bring a lot of modern death flavour to the stoner-rock sound Iommi and Sabbath innovated so long ago. The power of the riff compels you!

Highlight: “Winter’s Wolves”

The Bouncing Souls – “How I Spent My Summer Vacation” (2001)

Here’s something I’ve never done: review an album using the first lyrics of the first track and still manage to accurately describe how the record makes me feel.

I put that record on just to make a sound / The rhythm hit / It got my movement off the ground / The soundtrack of what I want to be / If I want to change the world, it’s gotta start with me”

Highlight: “Manthem”

The Stills – “Logic Will Break Your Heart” (2003)

If I had attempted to put this list into any sort of countdown, “Logic” would most definitely be number one, even though I normally don’t listen to music this poppy. Think Coldplay meets Interpol. Words can’t describe how brilliant this record is. There are few records out there that make me as proud to be Canadian as this one does.

Highlight: “Animals and Insects”

The Gaslight Anthem – “Sink or Swim” (2007)

This is The Gaslight Anthem listening to a lot of The Clash as opposed to their recent adoration of all things Springsteen. From a punk rock fan’s standpoint “Sink or Swim” is their best album. These guys need no introduction now, but readers should make it a priority to listen to this record if they like what they hear on the radio.

Highlight: “1930″

Fucked Up – “Epics in Minutes” (2004)

I cheated a little bit here because “Epics” is actually a collection of Fucked Up’s A-sides up to that point (they have a second collection due out soon, I think). But whatever, I’ve listened to this record more times than any other record ever; iTunes told me so. Chances are you know them as the Toronto hardcore punk band who won the Polaris Prize this year. Before they wrote boring concept albums devoid of almost any actual lyricism they wrote fast, short, pissed off hardcore songs about fighting cops or diss tracks aimed at Billy Talent. “Epics in Minutes is the reason Fucked Up is such a great band.

Highlight: “Police”

Tags: bouncing souls, decade in review, fucked up, gaslight anthem, hardcore, minus the bear, moneen, punk, seafood, soul control, stills, the sword, the warriors, tyler aikens
Posted in 2000's: A Decade in Review, Lists, Reviews

11
Dec
2009

Ten Unappreciated Films since 2000

14 Comments

The next in a series of Unfiltered Smoke decade retrospectives. This one by Doug Dickinson.

Ten Under-Appreciated Films of the Decade

I was already planning a “best films of the decade” list for my blog when Jason asked me to do a list for Unfiltered Smoke. Therefore, I decided to try something a little different. This is a list of ten films from the decade that I thought were under-appreciated. As far as I’m concerned all of them are great films that received bad reviews, did horrible at the box office, or were generally disliked by filmgoers.

The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford – 2007 – Directed by Andrew Dominik

This three hour Western is an in-depth character study of one of the most famous outlaws in American history. Despite the fact that it has Brad Pitt in the starring role, it made barely any money and is considered a commercial failure. It’s a shame, because The Assassination of Jesse James is one of the best films of the decade and deserves to be seen by more people. It tells a fascinating story through strong performances and stunning photography.

The Fountain – 2006 – Directed by Darren Aronofsky

My theatre experience with The Fountain was one of the weirdest I’ve ever had. While I sat there riveted to my seat, people around me got up and walked out only minutes into the movie. I understand that it’s a very odd film. One that is hard to understand even after multiple viewings. But as challenging as it is, there is a lot to like if you keep an open mind. The performances and imagery are beautiful, and Clint Mansell’s score is arguably the best of the decade. I challenge everyone to sit through the movie once and give it some thought before dismissing it.

In Bruges – 2008 – Martin McDonagh

Of all the films I saw this decade I don’t know if there were any that managed to be funnier than In Bruges. Writer/Director Martin McDonagh’s full-length film debut feels similar to Tarantino crime films such as Pulp Fiction and Reservoir Dogs, but the smart writing is infused with so much humour that it works best as a comedy.

The most surprising thing about In Bruges is Colin Farrell’s acting. I have always liked his work, but his performance here is quite stunning, managing to be equally funny and moving. Brendan Gleeson and Ralph Fiennes give their usual great work, obviously enjoying themselves as they shoot alarming amounts of bullets and curse words.

Kingdom of Heaven (Director’s Cut) – 2005 – Directed by Ridley Scott

Ridley Scott has a history of getting screwed over by studios, and it has never been more obvious than with Kingdom of Heaven. He was forced to cut entire storylines out of the film to make it more action-packed. The film as it was seen in theatres was a decent action movie that seemed to be lacking in plot.

When the Director’s Cut was released, people were surprised to discover a completely different film. Well over an hour of content was added, making Kingdom of Heaven a slower-paced film that’s more comparable to Lawrence of Arabia than to Gladiator. It’s a shame that Scott wasn’t able to release his intended vision in theatres, but at least we have the ability to view it on DVD. The Director’s Cut of Kingdom of Heaven is a modern masterpiece.

The New World – 2005 – Directed by Terrence Malick

Few directors split audiences like Terrence Malick. The poetic storytelling, slow as molasses pacing and long run-times make most of his movies love it/hate it affairs. The New World is an even tougher sell than his other films such as Days of Heaven and The Thin Red Line. It’s a two and a half hour long take on the story of Pocahontas that has hardly any dialogue or action. Most of the film is made up of nature shots.

I adore Malick’s filmmaking, and while I don’t think The New World is as good as his previous films, I still consider it to be a great piece of work that is filled with beautiful cinematography and naturalistic performances. Everyone should try to watch at least one Malick film in their lifetime. Either you’ll be put to sleep or you’ll be a fan for life.

Once – 2007 – Directed by John Carney

Once came out of nowhere to become of my favorite movie of 2007. All I knew about it beforehand was that it was a tiny indie film that got insanely good reviews from critics. When I watched it at two in the morning one night after work, I was blown away by its honest romantic story and raw musical performances. I was so moved that I sat in tears, unable to go to sleep.

I loved the movie so much that I watched it numerous times in the following days, and most of my friends can attest to having me force the DVD on them until they agreed to watch it. Sadly not many people seemed to catch on to the movie, and I routinely see copies of the DVD sitting ignored in bargain bins.

Speed Racer – 2008 – Directed by Andy and Larry Wachowski

Speed Racer was one of the biggest box-office and critical failures of the decade. It received a razzie nomination, was on numerous “worst films of the year” lists, and seems to be hated by nearly everyone I talk to, whether they have seen it or not. The first time I saw it I had no idea what to expect. I thought the trailers were great, but at the same time there were a ton of negative reviews.

After watching Speed Racer I couldn’t understand why it’s so harshly disliked. Yes, it has its flaws, mainly the terrible pacing and bloated runtime. That said, I think it’s one of the most fun action flicks of the decade and I adore the visual style of the film. This is exactly how a live action adaptation of a retro cartoon should look.

The Village – 2004 – Directed by M Night Shyamalan

There’s a large number of critics and film buffs who consider Signs to be Shyamalan’s last good movie, but in my opinion The Village takes that honour. I enjoyed it mainly because of the strong cast (led by Bryce Dallas Howard’s brilliant debut performance), haunting score, and beautiful imagery. Most complaints about the film seemed to be focused on the lack of spookiness and disappointing plot twist, which I’ll admit are big flaws. It’s not a great film, but I don’t think it’s as bad as a lot of people made it out to be.

Brick – 2005 – Directed by Rian Johnson
and
The Lookout – 2007 – Directed by Scott Frank

Both of these Joseph Gordon-Levitt starring films were critical hits that went under-the-radar of most film goers. I love both films equally and couldn’t decide which one to include on this list, so I’m listing both. Brick is a neat little film noir that takes place around a modern day high school but has classic noir dialogue. The Lookout is a smartly written crime drama that features great performances from Jeff Daniels, Isla Fisher and Matthew Goode. But the main reason to check out both films is Joseph Gordon-Levitt. He’s been one of the most under-rated actors for most of the decade, and it’s his work in these two films that made me first take notice of him.

Tags: assassination of jesse james, brick, decade retrospective, doug dickinson, in bruges, kingdom of heaven, lookout, movies, musical, new world, once, Reviews, ridley scott, speed racer, top ten lists, village
Posted in 2000's: A Decade in Review, Lists, Reviews

11
Dec
2009

Contributors Page

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Hey Everyone, We’re always working hard to improve our site and make it more user friendly. So now that we’re closing in on 100 entries, we’ve decided to add a Contributors page to make site navigation a little easier. You can still search older articles through the category pages, but if you’re looking for a particular author, artist, musician or photographer you can now search all their work in the handy Contributors page! It’s up top there, next to Home, About and Contact.

Thanks to everyone who’s contributed so far, we’ve got a lot of great material to share in the coming weeks, including a cavalcade of top ten retrospectives of the last 10 years.

-IT

Posted in Site News

Unfiltered Smoke

Archive for December, 2009

A Big Damn Shame – The Fall and the Fury of “Firefly”

Top Ten Albums of the 00’s

Up in the Air

The O By Gollies

The Best in Television Since 2000

Jawnpee Recommends Music from the 2000s!

Dear Asshole: Assholes of the Decade

The Best in Non-fiction of the 2000s.

The Definitive, Indisputable and Infallible List of the Unquestionably Best Rock Music of the 2000’s

Christmas vs. “Xmas”: The Ho-Ho-Holocaust

Jawnpee Recommends Movies from the 00s!

Favourite Music Since 2000

Ten Unappreciated Films since 2000

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